For the longest porn was thought to be some deviant gateway and I’m sure there are still bible thumping people out there calling for porn to be abolished like every other right those types of people try to take away. Porn is mainstream now and it’s everywhere. It’s not some taboo magazine your dad had hidden back in the day. Porn is easily accessible and it has so many variations. Porn can be good or porn can be bad, but porn can teach us many things if you let it.
If you’re one of those people who believe sex is only for procreation or that porn is evil then this blog post is definitely not for you. Even though you probably look at porn anyways then go repent by washing your eyes out with bleach, but to each their own.
Porn can teach us many things. It can teach us about masturbation techniques. It can teach oral sex skills and a plethora of other sex related techniques and what not.
Yes porn can be instant gratification used for self pleasure purposes, but porn can also be a gateway into finding out what we enjoy sexually.
Everyone is different and has different tastes and likes when it comes to sex. What porn can teach us is that while we all may like different things, there is plenty of different types of porn out there to satisfy everyone.
Why Porn is so Appealing
Who doesn’t enjoy seeing attractive people naked and having sex? With men being such visual creatures, seeing naked women performing various sex acts is what turns them on.
And in porn the male lead is usually not as good looking as the female lead. Why is that you ask? Because the people who make porn want it to resonate with the average male; their main demographic. They want average men think they can have sex with the hottest women. I’m not saying that can’t happen in real life, but the odds aren’t forever in their favor.
And while men are the main consumers of porn, women are not too far behind them these days. The amount of porn sites catering to the types of porn women enjoy has grown as well.
Porn is easier to find and view now than it was 30 years ago. Before people had to buy magazines with nude women and now they can just google whatever it is they’re looking for and they have a wide selection of sites to choose from.
And there are a lot of free porn sites like PornHub and others that let people scroll for hours looking at all types of porn that they want.
You can view porn on just about anything these days. Laptops, tablets, phones; you name it you can watch porn from it.
The Sex Isn’t Real
Don’t get me wrong, the sex acts are real. What is not real is how they quickly get down to it. You’re not going to find a lonely woman on the side of the road and offer her a ride home and two minutes later she is on her knees in the back of your van giving a blowjob.
The problem with porn, is that it desensitizes people to certain scenarios and acts. The whole if it’s on the internet so it must be true definitely applies to porn. People believe that what happens in porn is how sex is in real life.
Your stepmother with big breasts isn’t going to walk into the shower with you and tell you not to tell your dad as she strokes her you. Your stepsister isn’t going to get stuck in the window and the only way to free her is to take her from behind. Yet in porn, the step family genre is the popular one.
No woman is going to enjoy having her house broken into and while she is tied up she gets fondled. There are people who are into force fantasies and role playing, but they participate in consensual non-consensual sex with code words if things get too much for them. In porn it’s made to appear like women enjoy that and no woman enjoys being sexually assaulted I can guarantee you that.
The people in porn, for the most part, are paid actors. They’re paid to perform these acts and act like they’re enjoying it.
Differentiating what is real and what is staged in porn is always going to be a battle. For the vast majority what happens in porn is staged. There are real people who film and post their escapades, but for the majority of what is out there, it’s staged.
Knowing the difference between what is real and what is not can help you avoid serious jail time.
Fantasies, Kinks and Fetishes
Porn is great for learning what turns you on. Porn can teach you about what certain types kinks or fetishes are. You can find whatever fantasy, kink or fetish you may have online. There are so many genres and niche porn sites you can find whatever gets you off.
Even if you’re curious about a certain sex act or fantasy you can find videos of it.
Porn can be a great teacher. You read that right, porn can be a great teacher. Maybe you’re into rope bondage of some sort, porn can teach you the different knot styles of shibari rope bondage or how to properly bound someone to a bench or another piece of furniture.
While porn is primarily used for instant self gratification, porn can help you learn about what fantasies turn you on. And remember just because you’re interested in a fantasy doesn’t mean you would want to try that in real life.
Sex fantasies are just that fantasy. There is nothing wrong with exploring sexual fantasies, just don’t invite your friends over for a gangbang thinking your wife wants one.
Always talk things out with your partner before trying any fantasy or kink you saw online.
Porn Isn’t Just Visual
When people think about porn these days they automatically think about porn videos. But porn isn’t just visual. It’s audio, it’s written words. Erotic stories, podcasts and erotic audio stories are another form of porn that has also become more prevalent online.
The Potential for Porn to Ruin Relationships
For all the good porn can do it also can be dangerous. Like addiction dangerous. I know it sounds weird that someone can be addicted to porn but there are people who rather indulge in porn than be present in their relationships.
Maybe they degrade their partner thinking that is what they enjoy because they saw some actress in a scene enjoying having the male actor’s penis slapped across their face. If a woman enjoys having a dick slapped on their face I’m sure they can do it themselves and don’t need you to do it for them.
And that has always been the downside of how accessible porn is; how the younger generations think sex should be. No intimacy. Just clit slapping and spitting on a woman’s genitals and she is ready to go.
Sex in real life isn’t like that. Well it can be if that is what you’re into, but I think most women don’t want sex to be porn scene every time.
There are porn sites that focus more on the intimacy aspect of sex, but it’s not as prevalent as the open the door and let’s get to work kind of sex that is seen in abundance online. Porn can teach us to focus on our partner’s pleasure before ours, but porn is mainly manufactured for men so it often focuses more on a man’s satisfaction than a woman’s.
And with too much porn, there are people who can’t get sexually aroused by their partner anymore because only porn can stimulate them. And that can lead to their partners feeling inadequate and often resentful for their partner’s dependance on porn to get them sexually aroused.
Porn Can be a Great Teacher
I know you must be thinking how can porn be educational? Aside from learning about what fantasies turn you on, there is porn that can teach you either how to perform a sensual massage and the techniques associated with it for example.
Maybe you want to learn different methods of performing oral sex on a woman or how to better pleasure a woman in general. Lesbian theme porn can be a great teacher. I’m not talking about the lesbian porn where the woman has 3 inch nails and violently jabs them into the other woman while spitting on her clit. I’m talking about the lesbian porn where the woman pays attention to all of her partner’s erogenous zones not just the nipple and clit.
Same goes for women wanting to learn blowjob techniques to help satisfy her man. Or maybe there is a roleplay scenario that she wants to act out, but doesn’t know where to start. Porn can help with that as well.
The days of porn being viewed negatively are long gone. And while porn keeps trying to push the envelope, it’s up to the consumer to recognize the real from the fake.
And while the main reason for porn is for self gratification, porn can also be a great teacher if you’re willing to learn.
Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash
